Pics

I know that most of you have seen these on Facebook, but I have a few people that only read this blog, so here they are!

BTW, Mr. Lonley (well not anymore!), it was sooo good to hear from you! I'm glad you are doing well!

Behind, or Ahead, heck I really don't know anymore!

I am so behind on blogging it isn't even funny. So, I have decided that I am not going to try and catch up on everything that is going on in my life. It seems like all we do is go in circles! Everything is going good with us right now, there hasn't been any drama really. Ryan is growing every day, and just gets more cute every time I look at him! He is really developing a personality, and yes he is going to be like his dad. :-) Watch out world! He is also very much a boy. He loves the word "gross" and "disgusting." And (not to be gross) every time he passes gas he laughs. These days he is a mama's boy, and is very clingy. Hopefully, he won't be clingy like I was. (it was seriously crippling at times.)
As for Jake, he is working on shooting a short film the end of April. We are very excited about it. It will be the first film that he has directed and wrote.

What about me you ask? :-) I am hanging in there. Breastfeed and returning to work is proving to be a HUGE challenge for me. Which in return is really stressing me out. I am pumping 5 times a day on top of actual nursing. I think the stress is making it difficult to pump what I need to pump volume wise. So, I have talked to Jake and we are going to consider supplementing one bottle a day so I can feel a little less pressure at work. Lord knows I am stressed out enough there as it is. (We are short staffed and I am getting the short end of that stick.) At first I was really upset at the idea, but then I reminded myself that he is still getting my milk for 6 other feedings. And, I also am trying to remind myself that a lot of preemie babies never get to BF and I should be thankful that he gets any at all.

So, in a nut shell, I have been extremely worried and beating myself up, all while trying to convince myself that its ok. Does bi-polar sound familiar? :-)

If you have any advice I would really appreciate it!

Catching up...

I haven’t blogged in quite a while. I felt like I needed to get myself under control before trying to write anything. I feel like my job has been choking the life out of me. I really hate it. Banking just isn’t a great career right now. As if the world isn’t a hard enough place to survive in, try being in the financial industry. I think I could be a little more optimistic if I didn’t see the downfall every day. Its different when you are right in the middle. Granted, my bank isn’t going through what a lot are, but it is still hard to survive. People clump banks together in their minds. Anyway, enough with my woe is me paragraph!
How many of you are ready for spring??? I am ready for winter to be a distant memory. We have had a taste of warm weather this past week and I am ready for a real serving! I can’t wait to be able to take Ryan out for walks in the jogging stroller on the beach. I want to soak in as much of it as I can before we move. We are still not sure when we will be moving, which is very annoying. I am a planner.
Ryan is growing so much! I can’t believe that he will be 5 months soon! Where has the time gone? He weighs 14 lbs, as of last Saturday. We just had a round of pink eye, luckily I didn’t get it. Poor Jake had an ear infection, pink eye, and strep throat. He is finally getting better. I had gotten used to him not talking, so night before last when I was trying to go to sleep, I thought he had taken a shot of caffeine because he wouldn’t shut up! Lol! I’m so glad he is feeling better. I missed our conversation times.

Well, that is about it for blogging today. I really don’t have anything else to catch you up on, for now!