Life goes on...

This past weekend I was able to get away for a friends graduation. It was a much needed break, even though it was only a day and a half. However, all good things must come to an end, and on my way home Jake let me know that Ryan was sick. So, back to reality for me, and back to the Dr. for Ryan. Sunday and Monday he ran a fever all day. If the motrin wore off, it would spike to almost 102. Monday night his fever broke and we assumed that he probably had a viral infection, but decided we should take him the Dr anyway, just to make sure. An hour in the office and one throat swab later we were informed that he has strep throat. Not fun. So, then it was off to WONDERFUL wally world, where Ryan and I had to wait an hour and a half to get his medicine. For whatever reason, they had it in their system to not fill it until the next morning. So, that was adjusted to immediately. Then, they stopped filling it because someone thought they were out of it, but they didn’t page me to tell me this. They waited until I came back 45mins later (as I was instructed to do) to let me know there was a problem. As I am talking with the lady, it comes up on their screen that it was a mistake and they are going to finish filling it. (UGH!) I was told to come back in 10-15mins. Which I did, and it still wasn’t ready. Finally we got the meds and came home. It was a long afternoon and Ryan and I were both very tired and cranky. We ate supper and he went to bed. Then I treated myself to oreos and milk. J Talk about therapy! LOL! Things should start to get back to normal on Thursday. I can go back to work, and he can go back to preschool. Woohoo! I did need a break, but I hate that Ryan being sick was the cause of it. I’m just glad that he is getting better, and that we didn’t wait on the dr appt. Here’s to a better rest of the week, and a great weekend. (can’t wait to see you Leigh!)

One day at a time

Today was a much better day for me. I took control of several things that had been bugging me and as a result had a very productive day; I was able to lighten my work load for tomorrow by accomplishing several tasks today. :-)

Tonight, as soon as our little bedtime routine was finished, I gave Ryan a kiss and walked out. It only took about 10mins for him to fall asleep. He did get out of bed, but he didn't come out of his room. I am hoping that he will sleep well tonight. Last night he ended up sleeping with me because of the storms.

Those pesky molars are making his gums swell again, so I gave him some tylenol and also some allergy meds he needed. Maybe that will help him out. And now I remember that I forgot the anbesol...not good. Anyway, I am enjoying sitting on the couch in the dark, in the quite, typing.

I think that in some ways I am much like a child. I get overstimulated easily. Jake doesn't understand it. On the weekends, he will get up and turn on music first thing in the morning. Some mornings it drives me crazy! But, I try not to complain. He is a person that needs constant stimulation. (wow that sounds dirty! LOL!) Whether it be the ipod, the radio, the tv, or a movie, he has to have interaction. I, on the other hand, could go all day without any sound at all. To me it is wonderful to be in the quiet. I have enjoyed sitting on one of the sun porches at work lately for this very reason. I can crack the door to the outside, and listen to the wind chimes and the water fountain. Now that is awesome; Those are sounds I love. If I could find a CD of just those sounds, I would probably play it all the time!
Anyhow, In short, my day was good. Here's to a great tomorrow.

Life

For the past while, almost a year to be honest, I have been feeling very overwhelmed and on the verge of burning out. I've always been a slightly depressed person, with a tendency to be doom and gloom. I've tried really hard to change that aspect of my life, and for a few years (aka: at the beach) I thought I was able to work on it. I realize now that I wasn't really working on anything and simply redirecting my attention to other things and people.

Last year I lost a very dear friend and as a result everything that I had worked so hard to push down, started coming back to the surface. I have never lost anyone that meant so much to me. For months I cried myself to sleep. Even after I pulled it together and started to move on, I just wasn't the same. I realized in the past month that I am tired all the time,I don't want to do anything social, I am not happy, and as a result it has caused me to be really snippy with Jake, and even Ryan.

I have thought and thought about how I can fix this, how can I work on my life. I feel ridiculous. I have absolutely NO reason to be like this. There is no reason to feel like I do. Everything in our lives right now is good. We live in a decent house, in a half decent neighborhood. We both have good jobs. Our son is healthy and is in a great preschool. We've had some car issues, but who hasn't? We are paying down debt, all our bills get paid on time, and we have a little extra money for fun stuff. So, with all this in mind, I have decided to change a few small things and see if it helps.

Starting tonight, Ryan will be going to bed at 8 and by himself. Lately, he has been going to bed too late and I have been sitting in the room until he goes to sleep. This only allows me about 30mins to myself in the evening. I realize that I need some "ME" time. I need to unwind and just relax a little. Maybe by doing this I will go to bed a little earlier too...maybe.

I changed some eating habits, although you wouldn't know it from this past weekend! LOL
As a result I have lost weight, and feel better about myself physically at least.

I want to start exercising, if I can find the energy and motivation. (Its hard to do it alone...)

I also wanted to share this with my friends, because I know that you guys are my ultimate support group. We may not hang out, or talk on the phone, but I have always received solid advice and words of encouragement from you guys. (except that one stranger who sent me nasty comments about ultrasounds....)

Anyway....if you have any advice, please share! And, if you don't that is ok too.